Speleolabs

The Time Is Almost Upon Us...

Exciting news from Exeter which I think this really helps demonstrate to you the Speleolabs ethos and commitment to product. Andy logs in:

Rang the printer this morning and told him to stop "thrutching about" and for "Darens sake" get his "grot bag" together. He has finished the order except for the hoodies and wanted to ask whether we wanted the .com high or low on the back. This is because it may be obscured by the hood. I said do it just below the hood so that our marketing isn't compromised, because Speleolabs is all about proclaiming the brand. He understood. I made him recite our mission statement, swear allegiance to Dave Elliot and then everything was ok. He's got to realise that were not running a business, but an apres caving lifestyle crusade.

Some financial News - Speleolabs now has a small business adviser in the form of a Halifax Building Society Small Business Manager, and more importantly it's very own 'Speleolabs' chequebook. The first version of this chequebook apparently read 'Speleolads'. Whilst clearly wrong, we are indebted to the Halifax Building Society for unwitingly giving us yet another idea for a speleoshirt slogan. He also said the website was 'very nice', so we now have the backing of a major financial institution. Yay!

A Happy Customer Writes...

Our first customer testimonial! We've received a kind e-mail from a Dr Mark Horswill of Brisbane, Australia. Enthralled to have a new Speleomug, the lab's precision hydration receptacle (which we hope to bring to the shop soon) he writes:

"To all at Speleolabs,

Thank you very much for my fine speleomug. I have tested it for the first time today and was impressed with the thermal properties of the ceramic compound employed in the insulation layer. Did you use trial and error to come up with optimal thickness for the ceramic wall or was this developed from computer modelling? I also appreciated the ergonomic portability-enabler - allowing maximal grip when elevating the speleo-receptical to my mouth and rotating to drink. All in all, I believe this speleo-product has indeed enhanced my lifestyle."

And in answer to your question Mark, no, it just felt right.

The Speleolabs precision hydration receptacle is currently out of production as we've run out of them, and we need at least 10 people to crave one to make it worth our while. Please let us know if you think this item will best meet your hydration needs.

Cave Academy

It has come to pur attention that the BBC is using the Speleolabs corporate font for its 'Fame Academy' logo. This is the TV programme where a group of young people are stuck in a confined space and expected to use a combination of grim determination, tenacity and mindless optimism to prove their worth. Not unlike caving in fact. Hang on, I've had an idea... We get 20 young hopefuls down Daren Cilau and vote for them for the long lonely crawl out. Better still, get a load of well known cavers and run 'Im a Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here'. Can' t fail. It would make great (but dark) television.

In the meantime if anyone sees you in a Speleolabs T Shirt and expects you to launch into an impromptu performance of 'Unchained Melody' we apologise and advise you to address all complaints to Fame Academy, BBC TV Centre, Wood Lane, London W12 8QT.

Adventures in Marketing. No. 1 in a Series of 1

Aha, how about a speleomug surreptitiously slipped onto the draining board of every Caving Hut in England and Wales? This could just work! Viral marketing at its insidious best...

Thanks to our Exeter office for that idea. If we ever get round to having any new mugs fettled we shall announce their arrival so you can let us know if you are visiting a hut. We shall then cough up the goods in the interests of extending the Speleolabs brand. There will be no escape...

A Special Introductory Offer For Your Ears...

In celebration of the birth of the Speleolabs online store we've got five copies of the lab's own 'Speleomix' CD to give away. This compilation aims to put the 'clec' into eclectic and demonstrates the wide range of music that helps form our judgment and dance moves down on the shopfloor. Speleomix is a specially mixed CD by internationally unrenowned DJ Small Paul and is not available through all good retail outlets. A full tracklist is available here

To win a copy (only five available!) send your address to this link with the answer to this easy question:

What are Speleopants made out of?

and we'll see what we can do....

Good news!

Have checked with the Inland Revenue. Apparently we only have to start charging VAT on Speleolabs products if our turnover is in excess of £55,000. We shall bear this in mind. Best to get your order in quick though.

Calling All Women...

Are you a female caver with a sense of mischief and a finely developed fashion sensibility? We know there must be lots of you out there. We are calling out to you as we had originally planned to produce a 'Speleotart' women's Skinny T Shirt on the grounds that it was, well, kind of funny. See 'research' for a mock-up. However we need several of you to commit to this project to persuade our Exeter Division to take the design down to the shirtsmiths for full blown production. Or one of you with a slim wardrobe, no sense of variety and a bit of spare cash. Please please register your interest by e-mailing us. Together we shall make it happen - next stop the catwalks of Ingleton...

Chief Design Bod Andy writes in...

This is a good example of Speleolabs' ability to 'think out of the box that the box came in'. We present the (prototype) 'cyclopod'. Inventor Andy takes up the story:




Cyclopod prototype tested on Tuesday 1st April.

I stayed at home and finished the Cylopod. Once my Invention Evaluation Officer got home, and light levels had dropped, we both ventured to the Product Testing Arena (a.k.a the park) to try it out. It pitched easily, with the super light pegs being easily big enough to support the bikes. The mini karabiner system worked very well and allow one person to erect the whole thing with ease. The adjustment system on both of the VHT (Virtual Hoop Technologies) worked well. Altogether a very stable tent.

Refinements of the Cyclopod Wednesday the 2nd

Tried it again but with modifications on the under lines, and also added a groundsheet. Really quite roomy. Got Mountain Leader Mullens to photograph the 'pod. Weight it all, pegs, guys etc. and it came out at 1700g!!! Thats light! Next stage to add controlable climate vents and drying loft. Have arranged with fellow test co-pilot Foord to do a trans Dartmoor ride and try the 'pod out at the weekend. Getting the train to Ivybridge, offroading to middle of the moor, camping out Saturday night, then cycling (via Teignhead Mire) to Okehampton then roading it back to Exeter. Should be good!

These People Understand...

In case anyone missed it Speleolabs are not the only organisation pushing forward the boundaries of caving equipment. Some Canadians have also realised that there may be a better way - take a look at their Radical Alternative Technology Series (RATS).

Our Thinking Wellies

Thought we'd put in this picture of one of our lab R & D staffers hard at work in one of this early morning 'pure thought' sessions. At these times we place one of our staff in these specially designed 'thinking wellies' and don't let them go to to toilet until they have come up with something innovative. Apparently Microsoft do something similar.